Monday, October 24, 2016
519 - Jesus and the Curve Ball
Spirituality Column No. 519
October 25, 2016
Common Christianity / Uncommon Commentary
October 25, 2016
Common Christianity / Uncommon Commentary
Jesus and the Curve Ball
By Bob Walters
”’You tryin’ to say
Jesus Christ can’t hit a curve ball?” – Chelcie Ross as mythical Cleveland Indians pitcher Eddie Harris in
the 1989 movie, “Major League”
For my
money it’s one of the funniest yet subtle movie lines ever.
Voodoo-practicing baseball slugger Pedro
Cerrano crushes fast balls but can’t hit a curve ball. Meditating at the incense-burning altar in
his baseball locker, Pedro offers voodoo spirit Jobu cigars and rum to take the
fear out of his bats. “Straight ball I
hit it very much,” Pedro says to his teammates.
“Curve ball, bats are afraid.”
Eddie the pitcher sticks his head
into the scene and piously, derisively suggests, “Y’know you might think about
taking Jesus Christ as your savior instead of messing around with all this
stuff.” Pedro smiles, nods and says,
“Ah, ‘Haysoose’ (Jesus). I like him very much, but he no help hit curve
ball.” And Eddie, offended, delivers the
line:
“You
tryin’ to say Jesus Christ can’t hit a curve ball?”
Well, lo
and behold. In 2016 those once woeful Cleveland
Indians are in the World Series for real (against the Cubs, no less), and America
euphemistically is trying to hit one of the biggest curve balls in its history:
this year’s presidential election.
I doubt our American civic bats –
our voting responsibilities – have been this “afraid” since the Civil War, or
maybe ever. Can anyone say, “Strike
three”?
This all popped
into my head recently after reading a Facebook post saying Jesus was a
political rebel who wanted universal health care so there is no way Jesus would
vote conservative. Another meme asserted
liberals will hasten the end times.
Let’s be
careful with Jesus. Jesus was a rebel, yes,
but in religion, not politics. He didn’t
challenge Rome or argue with Pontius Pilate.
And the Pharisees’ accusatory
religious curve balls never fooled him. Jesus’s “Render
unto Caesar” line (Matthew 22:21, Mark 12:17, Luke 20:25) leaves politics to
mankind. And what he was trying to heal was sin, not bad health insurance. While we focus temporally on baseball and
presidential polemics, Jesus focuses eternally on God’s glory and our salvation.
C.S. Lewis
has a great paragraph in Mere
Christianity about Satan tricking us into faith errors against either end
of an extreme. Our extra dislike of the
one sin error, Lewis observes, draws us gradually into the opposing sin error. That’s what’s happening now. We become so politically disconcerted that suddenly
we’re telling one another for whom Jesus would not vote.
My guess is Jesus would neither
vote nor be drawn into the debate. He warns Satan “You shall not put the Lord your God to the test” (Matthew 4:7) and
constantly tells the Pharisees devastating parables of their faith errors and
God’s spiritual truth.
And we smugly predict God’s vote while
Satan is taunting us to hit a curve ball.
I doubt
many folks truly are ready for Jesus to come to bat.
Walters (rlwcom@aol.com) feels better when he reads the Bible than when he watches the news,
and also is thankful for the Indians vs. Cubs World Series diversion.
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